Epilogue
mahorova Lobby
This time it’s the 18th ward’s “The Friendly Hospitality Tour for Humans~ Thump Thump Tour~”... It seems like the participants are gathering in the mahorova lobby.
What an awfully lazy name for a tour. I wonder if this lax-nature is a trend recently? And what is ‘thump thump’ supposed to mean…
Ah, it’s you–.
Are you perhaps the bartender from Yumejuya from the 17th Ward?
Yup, my boss asked me to come, so I figured why not?
You don’t have that sachet1 that smells awfully like the sea on you today, right? Then shall we make our rounds together?
Going through a tour planned by Yowa-san all by myself sounds kinda awful. Okay, very awful—
MY EYES—!?!???!!
Wh-What is this!? Why is there a very strong light assaulting us out of nowhere…!?
mahoroba
Huuuhhh—!? Why are we floating!? Wait, are we seriously getting abducted right now…!?
That’s a peach… A peach-shaped UFO…!
Laika-doodle-do♪ Laika-doodle-do♪
Wait, is this how the tour is supposed to start!? Does that mean we’ve already begun!?
“As I suspected… Humans in general are far too lacking in the sense of danger~!”
DOWAHH—!? That was not good for my heart!
You’re huge!! Yowa-san’s huge!!
“Peaceful everyday life can crumble away super easily, y’know?”
“A’ight, take them away~”
Two guests to be abducted~ Swoop~
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!
“The Friendly Hospitality Tour for Humans~!”
This is… the interior of a space ship, I pressume…? It smells faintly of peaches…
For some unknown reason, everyone’s got weird alien-like helmets on…
“We operators would be happy to assist you. Hello hello~”
“You’ve all been abducted and altered by fucked-up evil-ass aliens. Those helmets are the proof.”
“You’ll need to complete a certain mission in order to return to being human.”
“That mission being… TO PERFORM HUMAN PROTECTION ACTIVITIES!”
Human…
Protection activities…?
To put it simply, it means to help others!
“We’d like you to carry out human protection activities and use those helmets to bring the humans’ stress hormone levels below a certain threshold. If you succeed, you’ll be able to return to Earth.
“I’ll also give you guys some body-enhancement ampoules I supervised the development of, so make good use of them!”
“Alright, we’ll teleport you to the mission site. Good luck.”
mahorova - Wedding Hall
…So we’re supposed to perform this whole human protection thing here first?
But how would we even—
KYAAAAH!? There’s a ton of evil pigeons around the fountain…!
They’re attacking people!?
Coo coo—!! Coo coo coo—!!
E-Evil pigeons…!? What a sinister cry…!
THESE PIGEONS WILL BE MINCED PIE… CHAOS CAN SAY GOODBYE… HELPING PEOPLE IS MY INSTINCT! EVIL SHALL BE EXTINCT!
This time, I’m the one who gets to save someone with this body-enhancement ampoule they gave earlier…!
Sighs... Guess we got no choice but to start cracking down on these pigeons. It’s my first time handling them though.
I suppose I shall give this Human Protection activity a try…!
“The Friendly Hospitality Tour for Humans~!”
Haah, haah, phew…
The bartender from Yumejuuya and I ended up going our separate ways…
First we cleared out the evil pigeons, then worked on exterminating killer pollen. And finally, we rescued a person drowning in back fat. I’m exhausted from doing all these activities.
I thought doing these activities would increase my stress.
(And yet… my heart feels a little lighter.)
All I have to do now is report this information to… my home planet.
Ahem, hello, hello~. I’m here to report the results of today’s human protection activities—
(Human protection activities… huh.)
(To constantly think of others and conduct yourself as a good person is not something we can do at all times.)
(So having a place where one can be conscious of their actions without any obligations can be quite valuable.)
Even today… I feel like I’ve become a better person. I don’t want to forget this feeling in my heart…
Thump, thump…
mahorova Lobby
A’ight then, who shall I abduct next~?
Can we play here today, mom?
Ah… That mother and daughter.
…!
Quick! Hide me, Gii.
? But she’s waving at you.
Huh…?
……!
Is…
Is she… smiling…?
Looks like it. Do you know her?
……Yep!
She’s a tiny witness to the fact that I’m a good kid!
L4mps Special Stage
Yuda. Thank you for coming again today.
Well, since this is Yowa-san’s tour, I can’t help but be a little wary…
But it felt pretty good being able to move around like that after a long time.
Still, isn’t that person a little suspicious… How can you trust him?
Well… After everything that’s happened, I don’t mind anymore.
Even without knowing each other’s true identities, we’ve spent so much time together as comrades that I’ve already become completely attached to them.
I would imagine that everyone else feels the same way, and simply chooses not to say it out loud.
…
...Don’t you think you’re being unfair?
Fufu, my apologies. Perhaps, I really am an unfair man.
Yeah, I know. … If anything, I know that better than you!
(I just logged out of mahorova since Netaro-kun and Nagi-kun’s live is about to start, but…)
So many of the tour participants came back looking so happy…!
(Originally, the tour was structured such that we’d rely on Netaro-kun’s inventions, but we ended up not going that route because—)
Boo.
Wah!? Oh, Netaro-kun!
Did I startle you, Doudou? Here, have this!
Ah, if I remember correctly, this is the ‘Space Polypeon Miso Butter Photon Gun Grill’…?
But Earth version.
This has such a unique taste, but it’s so delicious and addictive! The food stalls in front of the venue are doing really well too.
Told ya! Good thing I reached out to that Forehead-Appendage Alien in Fukushima.
Are you all set for the live?
Yep! I was wandering around when I found you allll by yourself, and I thought you must be lonely! So I came over to talk to you.
Hehe, thanks. It’s the opposite of what happened at the Healthy Gut Lunch Party, isn’t it?
(Even though the concept of ‘loneliness’ was foreign to you…)
(Netaro-kun, has your demeanor softened…?)
Oh, right. Might as well give you this while I’m at it.
Netarooo~ It’s almost time for the Hospitality Live~
Do your best, you two!
Man… For a moment there, I thought you two would be finished.
I’m glad we managed to hold the tour without further trouble.
Hm? There weren’t any major problems with this feature tour, were there…?
…………
Huh? What’s up with everyone…?
Well, that’s… okay, let’s laugh. Ahahahaha.
Hah, typical Doudou.
Just so you know, the Earth almost ended, and every living thing nearly died~♪
Human Observation Journal
Date: XX/♪X
Weather: Clear skies, good for seeing beautiful stars!
Gii’s Status Report: His eyes were all glistening and sparkling, it made my heart go thump-thump.
Discovery: Lately, I’ve been overflowing with curiosity about ‘loneliness’.
Gii and I are two different specimens, but because we share the same loneliness, I’ve learned that we can exchange warmth and emotions with one another.
If that’s the case, then I can finally make sense of that logic I’ve heard before! “Happiness is doubled when you share it, while sadness shared would be half as heavy.”3
Humans tend to talk about ‘loneliness’ in a negative light, but I don’t think it that way.
‘Loneliness’ is relative. And precisely because it’s not something you can simply swallow whole, you can feel it anytime, anywhere, and toward anyone.
Take my Beatrice, for example! I don’t know whether they’re already dead, where they are right now, or if I’m ever gonna meet them… But despite that, I still want to see them.
And that’s the thing! If there’s someone I’m longing to see, no matter what point in time they belong to, that feeling is proof of happiness found in loneliness!
So as long as I have that ‘loneliness’, I can keep savoring that happiness for as long as I like… Like a piece of dried squid that never runs out of flavour!
And so, this strange planet’s ‘loneliness’ that’s so delicious precisely because you don’t eat it—
Is a wonderful feast called “love4”!
Inside Flower Laundry
Slurp… slurp.
This tofu miso soup is soooo good! Gimme another bowl!
Got it. By the way, what happened with that whole end-of-the-world thing?
You’re asking that now??
I’m asking that now. Has Angelica-san reported back to your home planet?
Nyope. I immediately called my assigned operator as soon as the solar flare cleared up…
But they said that they hadn’t received any particular communication from my ex-boss. Well, they did say that they were retired and on vacation, so maybe they just got bored halfway through.
So she was on vacation this whole time… I wonder if she enjoyed touring HAMA, even just a little bit.
I did write up and sent a paper about this planet’s low military capabilities and the research value of human emotions, so this place should be safe for a whileeee.
Ooh.
Gwaaahhh… This is the first time I’ve ever worked in my life~… Though I’ve only been alive for a little over 40,000 hours.
Huh? So that makes you how ol—
Anyways, ‘bout that thing where I said I’d make you swallow a thousand needles for trying to break our contract.
Ah, about that, right. Gulp…
I’ll let it slide as long as you keep doing ‘it’ with me!
Ohh, what generous mercy… How fortunate I am…
No need to thank me! Put more of that jiggly thing into my miso soup~
Okay.
…Netaro. You said you wanted to be a good alien.
And I think, for me… being your donor makes me feel like I’m being a good Earthling too.
Sluuurp.
I’ve never had anyone rely on me or want me so desperately before, so I don’t know… It’s just, well…
So you’ve started finding joy in being needed by someone else.
When you say it so bluntly, it makes me feel a little shy.
Uh-huh… So that means—
FLASHBACK
Well, yeah! I want someone to love me… I want us to treasure each other, and I wanna tell them that I was born to be with them. I want us to love each other!!5
What is it?
I see. Tofu is soft, but it’s important to chew it well.
Linear Bullet Train
“...In ◯◯ city, an unidentified body was discovered in the early hours of last night.”
“According to police, the deceased is believed to be a foreigner—”
There’s been a lot of news like this lately, huh.
I hadn’t heard about it for a while, but could it be that serial killer again?
Haha, scary~
…
Ah.
(That alien I met in Fukushima… Come to think of it, I forgot to ask which planet he’s from~)
(I guess it’s fine if I remember to ask next time we meet.)
You’re… not a bad kid, are you?
The sachet Nagi made for Yodaka! This is from Yodaka's feature event story, "Drifting in the Sea of Tranquility (Track 9)!"
https://myuntachi.tumblr.com/post/778150664685617152/18trip-feature-event-translation-drifting-in-the"Temptation Towards Apoptosis".
https://shunin-gumis.tumblr.com/post/770383312450666496/temptation-towards-apoptosis-masterlistThis is a type of wordplay... The original word in Japanese is 孤悲 (kohi). It combines the characters for "loneliness" and "sadness", but when you say it out loud, it sounds like koi (恋), which means "love". This is what Netaro was talking about above. There is happiness to be found in loneliness. I want to talk and explain more about this, but I will do so in a Twitter post someday!
004: Designs of Happiness: Side B - 20.
https://yukikaze.love/tl/main/1/4/20